Finding My Way : Moving On
After making all arrangements for leaving for my new job, it was very tough as to give out items which I had worked so hard to buy for my house. It was all given away to friends and family. Even so, the new adventure has yet to begin. Day by day passed and the thought of leaving my boyfriend was hurting me more and more deep inside. Honestly, I didn't know what I should do. Should I express myself openly or should I just shield it from him so it wouldn't hurt him as much? I have decided to shield it from him. I acted happy and excited all the way from his home to the airport.
When we were at the departing hall, I was keeping a poker face to hide my sad feelings from him. I didn't want any tears. That was the last of what I would want when we leave each other. It shouldn't involve tears. He just stood there and gazed into my eyes longingly. I knew he was really hurt inside and didn't want me to leave but he had to because it was for my own future. I am glad that he was not selfish to leave me without a future. Tears welled up in his eyes and he started sniffling. I assured him that everything was going to be fine and shrugged away my tears with a smile. The moment I entered the hall, the sight of him grew smaller and smaller. I couldn't see him wave as much and his face was getting more blur. Tears started building up in my eyes and I couldn't stop them from flowing. I had to tell myself to not look back. Just keep walking ahead and wait for the new adventure to begin.
Throughout the time in the terminal I was constantly talking to him on the phone even in the plane before take off. The moment the plane started moving, I just had to turn off my phone and my heart felt so heavy to press onto the off button. I knew that leaving my home town is going to be hard and what's worse was leaving my boyfriend behind. The only way I could console myself was that there was a brand new adventure waiting for me at the other end of the destination.
Only when I got to Dubai did I realise how much he loves me. How much he is willing to give up for me. It made me think that I was not good enough for him. Was I really worth all the trouble? Was I worth his future? What is it that I have got that he knows that I don't know of? He constantly kept in touch with me via the Internet and was very careful with the time he calls me. He would stay up late just to chat for 5 minutes with me on the net and then go to sleep for a few hours to go to work the next day.
The day I arrived in Dubai was 2 weeks before our 1 year anniversary. I missed this year's christmas with him and our very first anniversary. I know how much it hurts him but we both had no other choice. Hopefully things will make a big turn in the near future.
I love you my darling sweetheart.
When we were at the departing hall, I was keeping a poker face to hide my sad feelings from him. I didn't want any tears. That was the last of what I would want when we leave each other. It shouldn't involve tears. He just stood there and gazed into my eyes longingly. I knew he was really hurt inside and didn't want me to leave but he had to because it was for my own future. I am glad that he was not selfish to leave me without a future. Tears welled up in his eyes and he started sniffling. I assured him that everything was going to be fine and shrugged away my tears with a smile. The moment I entered the hall, the sight of him grew smaller and smaller. I couldn't see him wave as much and his face was getting more blur. Tears started building up in my eyes and I couldn't stop them from flowing. I had to tell myself to not look back. Just keep walking ahead and wait for the new adventure to begin.
Throughout the time in the terminal I was constantly talking to him on the phone even in the plane before take off. The moment the plane started moving, I just had to turn off my phone and my heart felt so heavy to press onto the off button. I knew that leaving my home town is going to be hard and what's worse was leaving my boyfriend behind. The only way I could console myself was that there was a brand new adventure waiting for me at the other end of the destination.
Only when I got to Dubai did I realise how much he loves me. How much he is willing to give up for me. It made me think that I was not good enough for him. Was I really worth all the trouble? Was I worth his future? What is it that I have got that he knows that I don't know of? He constantly kept in touch with me via the Internet and was very careful with the time he calls me. He would stay up late just to chat for 5 minutes with me on the net and then go to sleep for a few hours to go to work the next day.
The day I arrived in Dubai was 2 weeks before our 1 year anniversary. I missed this year's christmas with him and our very first anniversary. I know how much it hurts him but we both had no other choice. Hopefully things will make a big turn in the near future.
I love you my darling sweetheart.
posted by Wildfire Princess at
9:07 PM
2 Comments:
Hey you! Hope you've somewhat adjusted to life in Dubai. Yeah leaving home is always hard at first, but you'll get use to your new surroundings eventually =) One of the beauties of being human is that we always find a way to cope.
As for you and your darling, I wish you both all the best. Here's one of my philosophies (#2587 from 'Flower Power: Reaching Enlightment', written by me of course *wink*): There's always a choice. You just gotta make it & stick with it.
Yes, you're right... I am cracked (but you probably know that by now. hahaa!) Aight, you take care girl & all the best!
Here's to World Peace,
Lydd.
p/s: Btw, I was wondering if you could answer this thing for me (given my extremely great fear of flying): Why do they have to keep the window shutter up when landing? What's the big deal man?
I actually do know the answer for the shutter being up...
It's basically an international ruling and the reasoning behind it is so that passengers can see the landing (to anticipate the slight bump) and also to see if anything goes wrong...
I love you too, my Wildfire Princess
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